The Cubicle Chronicles

Wednesday, November 30, 2005

Policing the Police!

Good Morning Citizens!

Nothing is more valuable to people than their own safety. In fact people are so obsessed with safety, they're willing to give up quite a bit of freedom just to feel as though they are safe from all the "bad things" and "evil doers" of the world. The government creates laws to increase the level of safety of its citizens and empowers police officers to enforce those laws. Unfortunately, with great power comes great responsibility... and sometimes an enhanced sense of ego and self-worth. Often times, those in power are brainwashed into thinking that they are more important than other citizens and that they are above the laws they enforce.

For example:

"When any law enforcement officer tells you to do something or not to do something, you do exactly what you're told," Rolon said. "If you do something different, you're in violation. ... I'm not one of your kids. I'm not one of your homies. I'm not one of your friends. I am not afraid of any one of you or all of you put together. And if you want to play with me I will play back...And law enforcement officers always win." - Officer Rolon of the St. Petersburg PD, lecturing a school bus full of kids ( http://www.sptimes.com/2005/11/30/Tampabay/Handcuffs_on_13_year_.shtml )

Today's topic raises the question of "Who's policing the police?"

From beating Rodney King's ass to little kindergarteners being thrown in cuffs, when is enough, enough? What kind of shitty psych evaluations are these departments using, and furthermore what kind of "tough guy, bully" culture is living in the law enforcement agencies of our country?

My main questions are:


What percentage of law enforcement are ex-military? And, if a large percentage (my assumption), is the "military" mindset really appropriate when dealing with civilians? children? Granted all police officers must receive police academy training, however, does the "yahoo cowboy" military culture still pervade the culture of law enforcement?

Are the issues of police corruption, abuse of power, and militancy something that we should be concerned with? Or, is it only a handful of bad seeds within random departments that the media sensationalizes just to sell stories? I guess if it is the latter, then how many bad seeds are acceptable in a occupation whose purpose is to "serve and protect the people", not themselves?

I turn it over to the minds that be....

Tuesday, November 29, 2005

Priests; "gay", or just glad to see you?

Good Morning Christians, Muslims, Hindus, Taoists, Jews, Buddhists, and all you other monkeys!

I had a wonderful visit back to the Mitt for Thanksgiving, and would like to thank all of those who joined me in killing braincells and giving our livers a good Irish workout!

So everyone has heard the joke about the priest who asks the alterboy to sit on his lap and the boy asks the priest what's poking his bottom, and the priest says it's but the hand of God? Oh, maybe I read that in the paper or something...

Anyway, today I read the following article ( http://www.nytimes.com/reuters/international/international-pope-gays.html ) which talks about the Vatican banning all homosexuals and those with "deep-seated homosexual tendencies" from entering priesthood.

However, in keeping consistent with good ole' Catholistic hypocrisy, the church says

``Such persons must be accepted with respect and sensitivity. Every sign of unjust discrimination in their regard should be avoided. They are called to fulfill God's will in their lives and to unite to the sacrifice of the Lord's Cross the difficulties they may encounter,''

All of this is based upon the flack the church has been getting from news reports and scandals of priests playing "pin the priest on the alterboy".

Where to begin, where to begin....

#1. Is there a difference between child-molesting perverts and homosexuality?

According to the research found in psychology there is a huge difference....but then again what do those stupid researchers know?! I mean, they're just as silly as those scientists that said that the world is round and say that we're evolved from apes! HA!

#2. "Seminaries have a serious duty to see to it that candidates for the priesthood do not `present disturbances of a sexual nature which are incompatible with the priesthood.'''

Isn't there something "disturbing" about a group of people who believe there's some magical omnipotent being that says "having sex is sin" and you should feel guilty about it? Furthermore, all those entering the elite "priesthood" should never have sex again; Isn't that considered a little off-kilter, or rather, a "disturbance of a sexual nature?"

#3. Is the Vatican passing the buck of sexual dysfunction from their own screwed-up "anti-sex" ideology to the naturally-occurring phenomenon of homosexuality?

Many studies of other species have noted the presence of the homosexual phenomenon, but I can't think of one species that "purposefully" avoids sexual contact or breeding. Which "lifestyle" is more natural?

#4. (In reference to homosexuals) ``Such persons must be accepted with respect and sensitivity. Every sign of unjust discrimination in their regard should be avoided. They are called to fulfill God's will in their lives and to unite to the sacrifice of the Lord's Cross the difficulties they may encounter,''

I'll just let you run with this one....if you can't see the blatant hypocrisy, "may god have mercy upon your logical reasoning!"

Hit us with your skills and get us learnt!

Wednesday, November 23, 2005

DNA's double helix blade...

Happy pre-Thanksgiving!

Tonight as you consume mass quantities of distilled pleasure during the busiest bar night of the year, think about all of the crimes that you could commit during your drunken stupor! With a reduced capacity for self-control and inhibition, you could find yourself thinking that humping a police cruiser in front of a group of overly testosterone-pumped officers a "good idea!"

Or perhaps, you'll wake up Thanksgiving morning with a pounding headache, and a couple of officers pounding on your front door to arrest you for a crime you know you didn't commit...but then again, aren't real sure due to the mass slaughter of braincells the night before.

Next thing you know, you're in court for sexual assault charges and there's a victim pointing at your mug as the perpetrator! You spend 18 years in the county jail for sexual assault, until one day an activist group that pushes for legislature requiring DNA testing be used to free falsely convicted individuals comes along. They want to help you, and convince "The Man" to run a DNA test on a pubic hair that they found on the victim.

*Ding*

Not only does the pube NOT match your DNA, but it matches some other guy who lived in the same area as the victim and is currently spending time in the pokey for none other than "sexual assault". You become the activist groups' poster child! They tour you around showing you off, have you speak at events, and help you put together a multi-million dollar lawsuit for wrongful imprisonment.

And then...you're arrested for murder and dis-membering a corpse because they find some photographer chopped up in her car in your backyard. Here's the rub: the same technique of analyzing DNA evidence that was used to free you is used to arrest you when they find both your blood and her blood in the vehicle. DAMN!

Well, for the most part, that's this guy's story: ( http://www.nytimes.com/2005/11/23/national/23exonerate.html?pagewanted=1&ei=5094&en=5e315958c202e720&hp&ex=1132808400&partner=homepage )

There are two issues here:

1. The Man
2. The Cause

1. The Man: A real piece of work. Prior convictions of animal abuse and robbery, and then he spends 18 years in prison for a crime he didn't commit. But now, he's back in prison for murder! When the monkey was released from his 18 year stint in the clink, he had lost his wife, family, and 18 years of his life. He obviously isn't an exemplary "upstanding citizen", but he did spend 18 years in prison for something he didn't do.

2. The Cause: The activist group, the "Wisconsin Innocence Project", is taking a lot of heat for their poster child getting himself charged with murder after his release; people are even touting that "a girl would still be alive if they hadn't freed him!" Although the activist group helped him before, now they are reluctant to have anything to do with him. The media is eating it up; the irony. The perception by the mass public is that this weakens their case, whether or not it is relevant or not.

This leads me to the following inquiries:

The issue:
What are your opinions on the DNA testing of current prisoners who may be wrongly imprisoned in efforts to know 99.9% whether or not they should be there or not?

Is monkey boy's situation relevant to the legislation, where, even if wrongfully imprisoned, some people are better left in prison?

The man:
Do you think that the 18 years Monkey Boy spent in prison may have influenced whether or not he would have committed this murder (under the assumption he's guilty)? Basically, do you think prison had a negative impact and contributed to his actions following his release? Or was he bound to return to the clink anyway based upon his prior convictions?

DO IT!

Monday, November 21, 2005

Oh-Be-Cities; "phat" or just "fat"?

Top of the morning to you all!

I'm no Calvin Klein model, nor would I want to be. However, just for my own amusement, I do occasionally strut down the hallway of my residence in nothing but my boxer briefs with my arms swinging, head bobbing, and enter my bedroom with a dashing left turn, pause, and stare at my "awe-struck" dresser with my best Blue Steal pose. To the relief of my neighbors, I try to keep the blinds at least 3/4 drawn.

History for developed countries, and current times in struggling "3rd world" countries depicts the thin body types of society to be indicative of the lower income, physical labor-oriented, and the presumingly "low socio-economic", poor end of the social ladder who are thinner because they cannot afford an excess, or even enough for that matter of food and sustenance. On the "high socio-economic" end of the ladder, the wealthy are depicted with increased size in terms of fat percentage and overall health, presumingly because the wealthy can afford enough, and even excess amounts of food to sustain themselves. La-Di-Da, Da-Da......

However, as one of the wealthiest countries in the world, we need to wake the fuck up because obesity has "weighed-in" the costs:
  • Obesity costs the U.S. $117 billion a year indirectly
  • Obesity costs more than 39 million lost work days each year
  • Three-fourths of the $1.4 trillion the U.S. spends on health care is to treat chronic illnesses, many of which are tied to obesity and overweight (United Health Foundation, 2004)

Walmart has been ridiculed lately in the news for sending a memo to hire healthier employees to try to reduce their health care costs associated with the above; but, should they be ridiculed?

Or is it us as a society that should be ridiculed for allowing over 31% of our population to become obese?

You want a cure for obesity? Here, I won't even charge you $19.99:

  1. Stop eating fast food; they'll get the hint and start making their menu healthy when the public won't eat their shit.
  2. Get off your fat-ass and exercise; 20 minutes, 3 times a week...you've got time jack-ass!
  3. Stop making excuses; "oh, it's my genetics"...."oh, I'm large and in charge"..."oh, I like myself the way I am"... We've spent too much time coddling the weak minded and the weak willed, why should tax payers pay for your fat ass to get health care for your self-inflicted obesity?

The topic today; "Obesity", is it okay, or should we as a society start lighting a fire under some fat asses?

What right do obese people have complaining that seats on airplanes and school desks are not "ergonomically" correct? Shouldn't we be asking the obese person why they're not ergonomically correct?

What do yall think? And just for yucks here are the top ten fattest cities in the country:

- The Top 10 Fattest Cities -

  1. Houston
  2. Philadelphia - "Too many Philly Cheese-Steak Hoagies"
  3. Detroit - "Too much winter!"
  4. Memphis - "Too much BBQ"
  5. Chicago - "Too much Deep Dish"
  6. Dallas
  7. New Orleans - "Too much Etoufee"
  8. New York - "Too many big slices"
  9. Las Vegas - "Too much greed"
  10. San Antonio

I guess everything in Texas is bigger!

Thursday, November 17, 2005

The Silence of Science?

Good Morning!!

Skipping the usual 1-2 sentences of foreplay, we go forth into the fray:

Science:
1.
a) the observation, identification, description, experimental investigation, and theoretical explanation of phenomena.
b) such activities restricted to a class of natural phenomena.
c) such activities applied to an object of inquiry or study.
2. Methodological activity, discipline, or study
3. An activity that appears to require study and method.
(Dictionary.com)

"Science is a systematic method of continuing investigation that uses observations, hypothesis testing, measurement, experimentation, logical argument and theory building to lead to more adequate explanations of natural phenomena... Scientific explanations are guilt on observations, hypotheses, and theories. A 'hypothesis' is a testable statement about the natural world that can be used to build more complex inferences and explanations. A 'theory' is a well-substantiated explanation of some aspect of the natural world that can incorporate observations, inferences, and tested hypotheses"
(Kansas Science Education Standards, 2005)

If you haven't heard, the state of Kansas education board has adopted a definition of science that excludes the traditional "natural explanations" component in the definition of science. Meaning, one could theoretically posit hypotheses & theories that involve 'supernatural explanations', that is, if they are testable statements. (http://www.nytimes.com/2005/11/15/science/sciencespecial2/15evol.html)

The reasoning that some of the retarded, psuedo-scientist, right-winged morons give for this is based upon a handful of scientists who have criticisms and supposedly have found flaws in the evolution theory, among other philosophical and political perspectives.

Am I just a paranoid anti-religion fanatic, or can this be interpreted as a "back door" approach of setting up an educational system to discredit the evolution theory in efforts to create more support for creationism or "intelligent design"?

Science, in essence, is one particular branch of philosophy that attempts to explain phenomena based upon hypothesis testing and experimentation rather than purely with logical reasoning. Converging physical or experimental evidence is required for a theory to be accepted, then it is the nature of science to test and re-test that theory until it is proven wrong.

No theory can ever be proven 100% truth, only disproved or discredited. There will always be error in experimentation, and scientists must establish acceptable levels of error to evaluate probability or likelihood of a phenomena occurring. Evolution will never be proven, it can only be disproved. Doubt, does not equal disproval, and the Evolutionary theory is by far the most "probable" of "scientific" theories posited thus far.

However, most of the monkeys that inhabit this country don't understand science, or the scientific method. In our over-simplified advertising and marketing world, we want simple answers that don't involve variability, complexity, or uncertainty.

What are your views on science? Should science be open to embracing "supernatural" phenomena that cannot be tested?

Is "doubt" or "criticism" in this case, being used to justify including creationism, intelligent design, and other products of philosophy and religious belief into the realm of science?

Afterall, these students who are being educated in this system are going to grow up to be our future citizens, politicians, scientists, and educators...

Do it for the queen....or your "god" for that matter, and share with us your insights....

Tuesday, November 15, 2005

Everyday's a Holiday!!!

Good morning my blog-reading minions!

I'm sure everyone remembers when they were in high school and would count down the school days until the next break and/or holiday. Ahh, the taste of freedom from the 7 periods of brain-washing that pre-cursored our collegiate or "drifting" years following our 4 year terms of adolescent angst truly was sweet! No matter what the holiday, we were pleased to meet its acquaintance.

Recently, there has been national attention drawn to little ole' Hillsborough County in light of a decision made by the school board indicating that they will no longer close schools on traditional Judeo-Christian holidays such as "Good Friday", "Easter" and "Yom Kippur". The school board's decision was partly based upon requests by Muslims to add their holidays to the the list of days of school closure. Alah forbid, rather than canceling even more days of school to accommodate other religious holidays, the school board decided to allow students to take a certain number of "floating holidays" without penalty; however, schools would still remain in session. Certain holidays that naturally fall on a school break (i.e. Christmas, Chanukah, New Years, etc.) are coincidently during semester breaks and wouldn't have been effected.

Well, two members of the Board of Cunty Assministers.....I'm sorry, "The Board of County Commissioners" decided to get involved, (even though it is beyond their scope of responsibility), and raise a stink because the school board was "attempting to further erode the Judeo-Christian tradition that this country was founded upon." (Commissioner Brian Blair; oh you might remember him from the World Wrestling Federation tag-team, "The Killer Bees")

Anyway, at the last school board meeting, the school board pussies.... I mean, school board members, reinstated the previously observed religious holidays, excluding the Muslim holidays, of course...

It's true that this country has a majority of Judeo-Christian beliefs which imbed themselves in our laws and traditions, but weren't the pilgrims escaping religious persecution and control when they came to this land and raped it from the Indians? Furthermore, shouldn't there be a separation of church and state as stated in the constitution?

Just for reference, public schools are funded by tax payer money. For those slow-minded (CUNTY board members), those are public funds going to give those teachers paid time off on those Judeo-Christian holidays, as well as cheating those students who are not celebrating those holidays of an education during that time off. Let me reiterate that the original decision by the school board allowed students to take holidays of their choosing off without penalty, but still hold classes for those students who do not celebrate those holidays so they still have an opportunity to learn.


The issue:

Should the religious holidays of the majority be imposed onto all students? and is it fair to other religions and students to cancel classes on Judeo-Christian holidays?

Is it fair to cancel publicly funded school sessions for religious holidays? Was the school board being fair in their original decision?


I know this topic gets my nipples hard, so let's hear what you've got to say!

Monday, November 14, 2005

This Blog's for you...

Past song lyrics that foretold the second coming of the blog:

"My Blog is back, and there's gonna be a party.. Hey naaaa, hey naaa, my blog is back!"
- The Angels

"It's my blog, and I can write if I want to! You would write too, if it belonged to you!"
- Lesley Gore

"Blog-Blog Blog-Bloooog. Blog-Blog Blog-Bloooog"
- Ludwig Van Beethoven, 9th Symphony

Ladies & Gentlemen, I have mixed news to report:

Bad News: The Nazis in charge of the IT department will not return my e-mails, nor have they lifted the ban on the www.blogger.com site, so I would like to publicly say, ”FUCK YOU!”

Good News: I will begin to publish new topics that will be continue to be written in the cubicle, however, will not make it out onto the web until I return home at the end of the day. This unfortunately means I won’t be able to read or respond to comments during working (or “hardly working”) hours, but I trust yall will push forwards with the online discussions.

Those fans of The Cubicle Chronicles may thank Mr. Ben-Meir for his encouraging and inspirational words, as well as the assistance of his federally issued firearm that he gently pressed to my forehead, persuading me to continue my entries despite the IT fuckheads that believe they are doing their job.

So, keep posted scholars, for
The Cubicle Chronicles shall continue forth on its mission to help you intellectually masturbate and solve the world’s problems from the safety of your personal/workplace computers!

One last song lyric to take us home!

”I decided long ago
Never to walk in anyone's shadows
If I fail, If I succeed
At least I lived as I believed
No matter what they take from me
They can't take away my blog you see!

Chorus:
Because the greatest blog of all is written by me
I've found the greatest blog of all inside of me
The greatest blog of all is easy to achieve
Learning to blog yourself, it is the greatest blog of
all…”
- Whitney “Nose Candy” Houston